Monday, February 18, 2013

Moving around

It is moving time. Well, it is actually find a place to live and then moving time. I have done this so much recently that I don't even unpack most things anymore. I just leave them in the box unless it is something useful like a TV, toaster, bed, etc. Everything else stays in the box which saves a lot of time later on.

I have moved several times since 2000. Some person, who shall remain nameless (Brandy! It was Brandy!), told me that I move around like I'm in the military. I'm not. Much like women, the military has rejected me. Am I seeing a trend in my life? OH MY HEAVENS, I am.

Packing is always fun since you get to see what you have accumulated over the years and wonder what you have accumulated over the years. People pack and they say "Where did that come from" or "I didn't know I still had that?" I tend to wonder why I have certain things. Than there are the objects that make me think it is something I shouldn't have and I make sure I pack it down deep into a box so no one can see it.

Being careful about who you get to help load the truck is essential. First, people always expect something from you. I tend to provide beer and pizza. Those are good incentives since people always like free. Even if it is something disgusting people will take it as long as it is free.

Other kinds of people try to loot what you are packing. This is why every box should be securely fastened otherwise people will peep inside and there is always that person who will look inside and ask, invariably, if they can have something.

Moochers are the worst. They are always trying to take your high end stuff like asking if  you still want your TV, computer, car, etc. They never ask for a dish towel or a hanger. It is a shame since I would be willing to part with those.

There are also the things I do not want anyone to see. These are the things I put away before anyone gets there since, without fail, someone will pick up and accidentally hit the on switch so it starts humming and then, after the panic dies down, there is no getting back to work.

Finding a place to live is worse than the packing. Looking around to find an apartment I can afford is tricky business. I walked into one leasing office where I was asked how much money I make a year. The entire office staff burst into gales of laughter when they saw my number. Eventually, the merriment came to an end and one person said something had just opened up which might be perfect for me. This person brought me an open cardboard box and said they just got this in.

Some people ask why I don't buy a house. The answer is simple; the villagers. Everywhere I go, they run me out. I cannot find any peace. Residents stock up on torches when I come around. I seem to get communities to unite. Does that count as a skill? Getting people to come together in a common pursuit.

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